Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happens when you cross a porcupine, a beaver, a duck, a go-cart, a dinosaur, a star, a cheap "Big 'n Beey" bathroom, and the cookie monster? Justin Bieber. XD

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Women's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down -7

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the boy fail the test? He had down syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's worse than finding the Holocaust in your apple? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I'm Polish.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why couldn't the Asian man speak in chinese? He never learned chinese

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q :Whats the difference between a truck load of bowling balls and a truck load of dead babies? A: I don't have a truck of bowling balls.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your mom is so fat she's overweight

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? Megan Fox is alive

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the man have a heart attack? Because he suffered from high cholesterol and cardiovascular disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops