What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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why is there art classes so people can make beautiful pieces of art :)

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How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

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What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

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A man walks into a shop and picks up some items for his party. He walks out of the shop without paying for the items. The police are promptly called and the man receives a 4 year sentence in prison for shoplifting.

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Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

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why are chickens dying so fast? because black people are hungry.

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

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What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

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Manchester City

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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Why cant Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukaemia.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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You know the drill, the world is not as black and white as it was before, just because we are not on the same side, does not make us enemies either. As for whatever is going on, I can assure you I had nothing to do with the fall of the first underground, and neither will I make sure whatever you scraped together, large or small falls either, I realize I should have thought this trough some more, but we had little time to act on this one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops