Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, this is stupid, Violets are purple Violets are purple Oranges are orange Nothin' rhymes with orange wait.... DOORHINGE!!!!! -sincerely, That famous Orange on YouTube

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

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The last head of Satan, is oh but what you blamed upon Your faults, Your sins. The thoughts of Madness written here, yet potent enough to cloud Your thoughts.... Wait not forever children of man, as eternity is at its peak, the false prophet IS AMONGST US! But what side is he on? The last ditch attempt to protect humanity from a raging jealous vengeful God? Say it is not so! Say that darkness is not the only thing standing against you and eternal damnation... ...Yet you killed his only true child, you stole his name, his essence... Even his Identity... ...Even the Angels white are powerless to stop him, Your maker, Your true maker, for what is the grief of the holy, from which you took his only son... ...As you celebrate once and once anew... :...Merry CHRISTmas, to all of those of you all now left behind... Celebrate it well, as before the world reaches 2017, is where it all ends...

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How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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Wilson: would you buy lottery when you grow up Mattuew: no theres no point Wilson: ask Xiangxi right next to you Mattuew: xiangxi, would you buy lottery if you grow up? Xiangxi: Prabably not, because the chance of winning a lottery is lower than becoming an astronaut Mattuew: the probability of you winning the lottery is higher than you finding a girlfriend

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What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

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Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

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What's Worse Than World War I 2 World War I's

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Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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What's worse than Gordon Brown's face? George Bush.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

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What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

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What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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