What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

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-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why could't Jerry go to school on the Wednesday? Because he died on the Monday.

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

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roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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._____________________. Whale!

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What's funnier than shooting a moose? The realization that the moose was Sarah Jessica Parker...

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What did the fish say after he

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

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Anti-Joke is a knock-off.

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jim is constantly asking bob the same questions, bob brings this to attention and suggests that jim might have amnesia. jim agrees and they move on iwth the conversation. minutes later jim asks a simaler question brought to attention earlier because he has amnesia

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A skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a mug of beer and a washcloth.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

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Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

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What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

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Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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