what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

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Why did the portuguese fisherman take out a $20,000 loan with a reknown loan shark at exorbitant interest rates? He needed to buy a kidney on the black market for his drug addicted daughter who had also destroyed his credit score meaning he coudln't get a loan from the usual credit facilities such as banks and credit unions.

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how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

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When the mom came home from work, she was very tired. Her son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She says sure and makes one for him. The boy was very happy and ate his sandwich. I was actually lying above. The mom was actually killed by three men in hoodies that were hiding in her backyard. The came inside and also murdered the boy. Worst of all the killers took all of the food and the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat, Guess it doesn't matter since he is gone...

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

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What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

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What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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bite me

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What's worse than finding out that your dog has worms? Finding out that you have worms.

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Q: What do you call an anti-joke? A: An anti-joke

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A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

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13 =B you just learned something

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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