Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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How many jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. It really isn't that hard.

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What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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Roses are bald Violets are bald You are bald I think you have cancer.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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Dave: Hi John! John: I have Aids.

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Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

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A white man, a black man, and a woman are drinking in the local pub. The black man and the woman are hanged. Medieval European pubs did not permit either.

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Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

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bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock? Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Ron Paul for President!

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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Dad's writes on son's Facebook wall: "Dear Son, How are you? All are fine here. We miss you a lot. Please!! TURN OFF THE COMPUTER & COME DOWN FOR DINNER!!! by darragh hamilton

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What's the difference between car keys and truck keys? Literally nothing.

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so 3 guys are a plane George W. Bush, a mexican, and a chinese man. the plane is going down because of too much weight they haave to throw things out. The mexcan throws out a suitcase full of tacos and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then the chinese throws out a suitcase full of rice and says "we have enough of this in out country" Then George W. Bush pushes the mexican out and says "we have to enough of these in out country."

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What did the little boy with diabetes get for Christmas? A shot of insulin; just like every other day.

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what do you call afish and a cat? a catfish

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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