- Anti Joke

You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

Knock knock "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

Who is big and stupid My brother

whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

what do you call a fat man standing in the middle of the street a fat man

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah

There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

How do you cure cancer? do i look like NASA?

You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

Knock knock "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

I have an idea! You leave.

time to spruce up!

Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

Who is big and stupid My brother

whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

No it doesnt..

Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

what do you call a fat man standing in the middle of the street a fat man

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah

There once was a baby named Paul Bunyan who was as big as a house. His mother died at childbirth.

How do you cure cancer? do i look like NASA?

You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

What's green and red all over? That terminally ill child's vomit.

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

I have an idea! You leave.

time to spruce up!

Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

Who is big and stupid My brother

whats the difference between ian bothom and david gower? shredded wheat.

No it doesnt..

Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Knock knock "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."