Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

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What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

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What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

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Why did your mom fall off the swing? I shot him.

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whats green and slimy? green slim

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A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

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Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

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Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

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Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

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A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not. Sally..

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whats funnier than a black person dieing nothing that is so cruel

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So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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kill yourself....with a cigarette

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops