Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

What colour is an orange? Orange. What did you expect?

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

Massie is a fatass

Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

What's the best thing about having sex with twenty six year olds? There's twenty of them.

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

get it right up there, says jacob while with danni

What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

A black man walks into a convienent store, pays for his stuff and leaves

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

Why did Kelsey run out of eggs? Horses don't have much sperm.

What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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