what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

I drink poodle juice for breakfast lunch and dinner I was then turned into a tree

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

2 gay guys walk into the bar guy #1 say lets get drunk guy #2 says lets get wasted then #1 says... what do they do fall on the floor and do it.

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

What's the worst part about a plane with 500 people in it crashing? It might leave a dent in the ground.

Stop. Seriously stop.

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

-knock knock! -doors open

Bob Saget that is all

Roses are red, Your blood is too, Don't believe me? I WILL CUT YOU

Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Q. When's The Best Time To Wear A Striped Sweater? A. All The Time.

What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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