Why did the little girl stop riding her bike? She was hit by a car.

What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

A pirate walks into a bar, and the bartender asks, "why do you have a wheel in your pants?"

What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a beanch can support a family

Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

I'm HIV positive.

What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

What do you say to the child with bruises on his arms? Stop hitting yourself.

Q: Knock Knock!?! A: Lettem' in!!!!

Q #1: Why did Sally fall off the swings? A #1: She has no arms. Q #2: Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally.

Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum... ...and I'm all out of ass but still have plenty of bubblegum to sit down and chew in a quiet and leisurely manner.

What two states don't have running water? Solid and gas

What's worse than anti-jokes? The holocaust.

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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