A blond walks into a hair dresser's wearing a pair of headphones. The hair dresser tells the blond to take the headphones off so she can cut the blond's hair. The blond says that if they take off the headphones, then they'll die. The hair dresser works around the headphones, but finally needs to cut underneath the headphones. The hair dresser forces the blond to take the headphones off and nothing happened.

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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What did the minority say to the white person? Aboobasashagaboogly. He was uneducated, along with the other minorities in the world.

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I'm gay Mr Goodwin

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In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

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Once a man asked a lady working at the supermarket, Can I see your avocados? She kindly walked him over to the rack where they were being held.

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how do u make a baby cry? you shouldnt. Stop thinking of ways to make a kid cry... asshole.

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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How many Dead Babies does it take fill a phone booth? There is an obvious epidemic going around causing millions of babies to die. This is no laughing matter and the mothers of these babies are probably going through therapy to get over their lost.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

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Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

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Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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the boy fell, because he hit a bump.

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

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Ok so, we have bread , tofu, coolwhip

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Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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