What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

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There was a two car pile up at wal-mart. 50 mexicans were killed.

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The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead got into a street fight. who won? The redhead because she had a gun.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? three-thirty.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

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cory

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RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

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Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

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How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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Why are reading anti-jokes so funny? Im not sure, i just read them and laughter ensues.

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what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

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A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of.

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A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Polytetrafluoroethylene is a synthetic fluoropolymer of tetrafluoroethylene that has numerous applications

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Why did then plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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a man walks into a bar. He left after he drank two beers. Someone pulled his pants down and he didnt notice. when he got home he realized his pants were gone. He returned to the bar to search, but it was a metal bar, and he was fairly stupid. please dont laugh

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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