Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happens when you get hit in the face? You get hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

thumb_up thumb_down +20

My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Your momma's so dumb, she has below average IQ.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A guy walks in to a bar and says to the bartender "I'm fed up with all these 'guy walks into a bar' jokes on anti-joke. The bartender says "I have no idea what you're talking about".

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

thumb_up thumb_down +18

rarw

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Person #1: Hello captain obvious. Person #2: Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A guy gets murdered, because of the Reco act the whole gang he belongs to goes to jail as well. They cry in their beds

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops