Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

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Q:why did the lion eat the zebra? A: because it was hungry.

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Why did the nun cry? 12 babies were killed under her care.

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A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

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Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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So FDR walks into a bar.

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

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Knock knock. Stop making puns at my door!

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What's long and hard, and has cum in it? A cucumber

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How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

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How did the dog die? He was put down.

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Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

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If you place a dog next to a cow, they're not the same size

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

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Knock Knock Sadly the old woman was death and didn't hear the door knock.

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely, caucasian man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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Sosiopath vs How I met your mother: BABABABABA BABABA RARARA LALALA ETC YOU GOT THE DRILL Kids, this is how I met your mother. I saw her at some store, I said "Hey sexy" She told me to fuck off, so I raped her, got out of prison years later, and kids, that is how I met your mother. ...Why I am leaving? Did I ever fucking say I was your father? I Just came here to tell you I raped and killed her after serving my time which was about 2 minutes, so kids, that is how I killed your mother. YOU ARE WELCOME BY THE WAY!Ungrateful kids. Moral of the story: If they are your kids, just say no and get away, and kill Robin for better television. Sociopath vs Grounded for life Moral: Shot the little kid, nobody will notice, not even his own family.Heck if you look at episode 34 you can see a tall handsome dude choking the life of a little boy in the background, and then letting him go just before he passes out and chokes him again? FUN FOR HOURS!

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why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Cause violence is against the law

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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