1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

How do you keep your dog from running away? Put it on a leash.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

Q. How can you tell if your arm is broken? A. Break it.

Please don't shoot me

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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