How do you make someone sad? Tell them they have cancer

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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What do you call a man in the desert? Whatever his name is.

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Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

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Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

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Why did the weiner dog have a bad childhood? Uncle Monty put his foot up its arse on a daily basis before chewing dorris's nose, ears and eyelids.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

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how many babies does it take to fill up a blender? None. they all died before being put in a blender.

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Who ever invented the "Knock- Knock jokes" should get a "No-bell prize"

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There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

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How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

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What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

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jack and jill went up the hill to have a little fun. that dumb ass jill forgot the pill and now they have a son

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Gustavo Andrade

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What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

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who needs to get a different hairstyle to his boyo? josh roberts

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A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

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They say you are what you eat, but i don't remember eating a big bowl of sexy.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why couldn't the bird fly? cause it was a penguin

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Two clowns are walking down the street The first says, "Whats better sunshine or rainbows?" The second says nothing, then casually picks up a brick and beats the other clown to death.

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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