How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

What do you call an awesome bucket? An epic pail.

Why are pills white? Cause they work.

How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

What? Chicken butt Why? Chicken thigh Who? Deez nuts

Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

mom and dad went into the bedroom after a long day at work the fell asleep

What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

Bill had two options the red truck or the blue sedan. Your mother is a whore.

i 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.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... ME

I used to think skyrim jokes were funny. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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