Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Hunter cross the road? No one cares, unless he gets hit.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What is white, and comes out of a woman? A: No, milk you perve

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the Elf stab the Gnome? Because I was on a bad acid trip.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man walks into a Bar, and he gets kicked out because its an animal only bar no people allowed

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

When did Dom become so brave? When he made friends

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Have you ever ate a donut? Yes I have. In fact, the donut I ate recently was fairly delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An arab says allahu akbar, people respect him as he is pronouncing his religion in his place of worship

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops