Q: Knock Knock!?! A: Lettem' in!!!!

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What is a bull like in a China Shop? Calm, because generally any bull you would find in a China shop is probably made out of porcelain.

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It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's orange and sticky? An orange. What's red and sticky? My stool - is that normal?

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What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away her Gameboy.

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8-9-10.

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My teacher told me to so a report on women rights.....I turned in a blank sheet! ^.^

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What do you get when you cross a pug and a beagle? A cross pug and a cross beagle.

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

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A dog walks into a forest and sees a whale. The dog asks "aren't you supposed to be in the ocean?" The whale replies, "yes."

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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I have sexdaily. Sorry I mean dyslexia.

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Why did the 3 legged dog fall over? Because it was knocked over by a passing pedestrian.

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A guy killed his kids and wife Pokémon GO also exists

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops