Knock Knock Who's there? Jim Come on in!

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he didn't have arms.

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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What did the southern uncle say to his nephew when he woke up? Good morning, son.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

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I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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A man with Tourettes walks into his Daughter's kindergarten classroom. Fortunately, he was able to control himself and refrain from any outbursts of profanity during the visit.

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Detroit has a low crime rate

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What do you call a black man and an Asian working in a field? You politely ask their names and then use them; their colour is of no consequence.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

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Women's rights.

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops