A man found a magic lamp. He rubbed it and a genie emerged from the lamp. The genie asked what his new master's wishes were. The man wished for asthma.

Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

How do you cure a person that claims cannot say no to anything? Treatment: *locks door* NOW SAY NO TO ME! BUAHAHAHAHA! Patient: NO I CANT!!! You care cured! *opens door* NEXT!

"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

A White and a Chinese got in a fight, who won? None. The fight was unable to begin because a color is not a living organism.

What did the transvestite say to the fox? 'scuse me, you've got something on your shoe.

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp

What's worse than having embaracing parents? A: they are of the same sex

Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

Why the girl have a crooked leg? Her grandma thought that she was a pretzel and while the girl was sleeping the grandma tried to bend the girls leg into a pretzel shape

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

What happened to the boy who wnt through puberty? He bacame a man. There is nothing funny about a perfectly normal expirience that everyone goes through wether they like it or not.

If life hands you lemons you're probably a hippy because you know someone named 'life'

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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