What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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Once upon a time there was a tree. But it was just a tree, so it sat there. Then it didn't rain for a while, so the tree died. And nothing ever grew there again. The End

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

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The WNBA is on the cooking channel

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

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What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

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A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

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what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? None because alligators don't fly.

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

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ok guys finish this joke: Im the biggest fag-got because_____________.

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What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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