knock knock, whos there, isaac touch my titty

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

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"Knock knock..." "come in"

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why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

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Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

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A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

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Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

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Why didn't the parachute open? nevermind

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Why did the stop sign run a red light? Because it couldn't see its face...

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what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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Two attractive women were getting ready to visit the gym. On the way there, they stopped at a local sports store to purchase some new shorts, and they got it at a good discount price

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Like this if you have a big diick like me Dislike if you have a baby diick Ignore if you're a girl and get back in the kitchen

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what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

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silver bullet?

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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Q. what do you call mexican stoners A. baked beans

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Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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