ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

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Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

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Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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whats the difference between a black rapist and a white rapist? the black rapist is black

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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Q: What's multicoloured and spins around while screaming in agony? A: A clown in a washing machine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Apple

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

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Once Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a guy so hard that he got a large bruise.

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Too tired to come up with the definition, by the way, it was I that came up with the code system you guys use, so I kinda knew long ago that you lied to me when you said you do not use passwords,

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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