What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

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What's the difference between a lion and a stuffed lion? One is for children to play with, one will eat you alive.

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What's red and has zippers? Nothing, because watermelons can't physically drive without the help of a sheeps spinal cords ... DUH

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a man walks into a library Who the hell reads

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what is red, white, and spins around real fast? a baby in a washing machine

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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A blonde walks into a bar. She got free drinks.

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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Why did the boy find love? because if the girl did not love her he would kill her

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Q: How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 1, idiot.

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Q- Why? A- Why not?

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, and looks like a duck? Nothing. Ducks cannot speak, therefore this description negates all known living organisms.

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Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your stupid.

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Where did Susie go during the bombings? Susie was wandering around the streets as she felt like she didn't know where she was any more. Everything was burnt to ashes. She came across a man who she has never met. He tells her to follow him. She did.Later, Susie, the mysterious man and a few other people with him were in a private meeting room. The mysterious man tells Susie that he was a Frenchman and he was with the resistance. A few minutes later, the bombs were dropping everywhere. The meeting room was destroyed and Susie, the Frenchman and his men were under attack. The French resistance were about to fight, but retreated - for they were French. Susie was left, lying there as she saw a bomb in the sky about to land on her. She tried to get up and run, but the bomb was too fast. It got her. So yeah. Susie went everywhere, like you lot said.

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ROSES ARE RED VILOTS ARE BLUE I HOPE YOU KNOW IM A JEW

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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