Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"Knock knock" Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Matthew Baker

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Iceland is actually green and Greenland is actually icy and Germany started the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

haha

thumb_up thumb_down -10

An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's bad about the the 3 black Jews that just died...... They were my friends

thumb_up thumb_down -10

BIG PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is yellow and writes? -A Ball Point Banana!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

three lesbians on a plane they were all responsible and had sex when they got home and not on the plane

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Once there was a girl named Andrea

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops