Two friends are arguing over who is the best pie maker. '' I've made pumpkin, apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, and sweet potato!" " Yeah well I've made all of those AND pecan!'' ''Yeah well have you ever made boysenberry pie?!" "No! What the hell!" *in a calm tone* " Yeah, me neither."

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If u swipe fast u will see fish swimming -////--/// //-///--// --//--/// ---/////- -/////--/ ////---// ---///--- ---////-- --////--- //--///-// -//----/// -/-///-/// -/-/-/-/-/ -////-///// -/-/-/-/// -///------ ---------- --///-///-/ -////-//--- -/-/--/--- -/-/-////// ---------- --------- I will call ur doctor to tell him u are retarded

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Yo mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl! I'm sorry,that was just really rude of me. I've been talking to my therapist and I think this insolent behavior came from my dad. I always wanted his approval but he always liked my brother more and blah blah yak yak.....

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FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

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had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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A duck walks into a bar. The large African American male at table three punches the smaller Asian man at the bar because of a long standing and unfulfilled monetary debt. The Asian man procedes to pull out a concealed knife and repeatedly stab his assailant until he is dead. The duck orders several rounds of whiskey due to the fact that it has recently been fired from its job. Later that night, it took its own life.

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what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

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There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

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A whore walks in to a bar. She soon finds her John and they leave to his hotel room.

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whats the biggest ever snake found ? i dont know i dont study snakes :O

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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A woman walks up to a man in a supermarket and asks him where she can find the potatos. He says "I think they are all the way at the end on aisle 3" "Thanks" she says. Then she gets to aisle 3, and there aint no potatos!!!!

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Yo mama is so ugly that she never got married or involved with anyone in her lifetime because everyone was to scared and ashamed to be around her. you're adopted

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A man walks into a bar. Sup.

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Why is Finnish taxi driver smiling while driving? He's happy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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A blonde woman is creating an account for a website when she gets the "enter the following" box. The box says"How are you". She looks down at the bottom seeing the answer and puts"Good!".

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What do you call a blind person? Mack Despard

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Mum, "Why aren't you listening to me, are you deaf or something?" Son, (Silence)...

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

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roses are red, violets are blue. hey.

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what does a slim jim taste like? there is no answer because everyone has a different amount of taste buds

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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