What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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What did Soviet children dream about? Communism.

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what did the Nazi say to the Jew? I hate you

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How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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what does the sloth say to Jonah reincastle? nothing Jonah is the sloth

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

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Roses are rainbow. Violets are rainbow. Everything is rainbow. Thats why you don't take LSD.

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Q.What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A.Finding seventeen worms in your apple.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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knock knock who's there bang bang bang bang who where da cash at

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What's the difference between Marvin Gay and George Straight. They are two different people

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A penis walks into a bar..

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Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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vote this down and i will DOX you

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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Get on the boat.

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He applied for a Visa and was granted authorization to live and work in the United States on a permanent basis.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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