How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

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Roses are red, violets are blue Charcoal is black, and so is my neighbor

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Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

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What did the robot say to the boy? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and started to strangle the boy. The authorities tried to get the robot to stop but robots are too strong. When the robot had killed the boy, it self destructed.

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Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

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What happened to the lion which escaped from the zoo? It was successfully recaptured.

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What's the difference between a bench and a black guy? A bench can support a family

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs waterskiing? Skip

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Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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A man walks into a convenient store and asks the cashier where the toilet paper is. She says aisle five. He goes down aisle five and there's no toilet paper.

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Why did the woman put super glue on her sun glasses? Because she stepped on them and they broke.

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Every Good Boy Deserves Fibromyalgia

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Cliterus

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If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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