Three men walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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Gays always seem happy wonder why Straights complain to much

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why was 6 afraid of 9? cause thats just gross.

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

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In a galaxy far, far, away.... There were quasars, stars, and various sized meteors.

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how do you make a little boy cry? Kill his parents in front of him .

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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69

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One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

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Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

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I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

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Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

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What's long and black? A black hockey stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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