What's worse than homework? A basket full of mutilated puppies....

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Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

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A man walks into a movie theater.and attempts to parate a film. He is then caught by employees of the theater and now faces fines and possible jail time for his actions.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Voldemort

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I had a lemon. hi.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

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Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because if he stayed on the farm, he would have been condemned to a miserable life, subjected to deplorable living conditions and an eventual pain-filled death by the hand of a cruel and heartless farmer. Crossing that road was his only chance of salvation.

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Why does Billy hate waiting in line? Because he's impatient.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

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what do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question ................

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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how do you get a clown off a swing. hit it with an apple in his nuts

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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What did the boy say to the girl? I like you hi.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the fat kid get for chirstmas? diabetes

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What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops