What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? I don't hammer the watermon

what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

roses are grey violets are grey either i am a dog or i am color blind i cant tell im deaf go die in a hole

why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

Why couldn't the young african american read? He was born blind

How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

You know what happens when you assume right? Well, you make an educated guess based on prior knowledge to the circumstance at hand.

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

What do you call a black man throwing jars of flaming fruit preserves at a Jewish basketball player. MEXICO

Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

PENIS lol

Q: what did Katy Perry say when someone told her that she was adaopted? A: That's not true, my parents took pictures of me in the hospital just minutes after I was born.

Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

What is black and has no education A tire.

Antijokes?! More like Antijakes!!!

-knock knock! -doors open

Have you ever seen that gay clown in asda.

What is black, white, and red all over? A zebra that was shot by poachers.

What's the difference between a pessimist and a magnet? One is made of flesh and can talk, think and do things. The other is made of metal and can only pull things towards itself or push them away. But strangely, the latter is a lot more welcome in most situations.

Useful Information: *2+2=5 *4+4=9 *6+6=13 Q: Given this information, how many fingers am I holding up? A: It was a trick question. Batman didn't open the door.

knock knock! who is there? its knock! knock who??? knock knock... who is there.... i told you its knock... knock who??? knock knock... WHO IS THERE!! OMG I TOLD YOU ITS KNOCK! KNOCK WHO!! WHO IS KNOCK! KNOCK KNOCK OMG WTF! HOLY SHIT WHO IS THERE! ITS KNOCK WE HAVE KNOWN EACH OTHER OUR WHOLE LIVES! KNOCK WHO?? KNOCK KNOCK WHY DONT YOU REMEMBER ME! oh knock knock from next door! who is there???? jk.. knock...knock......omg put down the gun knock knock stop i love you knock its not worth it!! NO KNOC!!! GUNSHOT* KNOCK NOOOOO!!! I LOVED YOU SOMEONE CALL 911!! OMG KNOCK WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OH KNOCK WHY!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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