What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

What's brown and sticky A stick

Mugger: Give me all your money. Victim: No. Mugger: Okay. (Moves on to find his next victim)

rabbits running in my bathroom!

What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

Why did the black girls wear fancy clothes to the mall? Public nudity is considered a crime in many parts of the world. It would be advisable to wear clothes in public areas, so as to avoid being arrested.

Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

When you nut and slice her fukcing dumb head off fucking dumb BITCH DIES

The guy told a funny joke. Why wasn't the other guy laughing? Because he was having a heart attack

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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