A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Gay's

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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whats yellow? lots of things.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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What do you get if you cross an Irishman with a Brazilian Aristocrat? I don't know.

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Why did Larry fall off his bike? He was hit in the head with a brick...

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A black man, a Mexican man, a white man, an Asian man, a priest, a rabbi, and a prostitute walk into a bar. It was a very popular bar.

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Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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what is big and can make things come out? a gun

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A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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