One day there was a princess born in the jungle. The story goes, that she'd be saved by a grand champion - a Hero. So the day came that she fell in love. After a few magical years, they broke up and she realized that fairy tales are for little girls.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

-You know what will always get people fighting? -Hey, you wanna fight?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There is a asian, mexican and a blonde boy at school. Every day they each get the same food for lunch. The asian always got noodles. The mexican a taco. the blonde boy got pb and j. They decide if they get this lunch again, they will jump off a cliff. The next day they get the same lunch and jump off a cliff. At their funeral the asian mom says " if i had known, i would have made her sushi." the mexican mom says " i would have made her a burrito." The blonde's dad say "hey don't look at me, he makes his own lunch."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Pop Fiction last words. guess who edition: "Okay okay you win again Batman! Ahahaha hohohoho hehehehe! Wanna hear a new jo... Eh... what are you doing with that gun?" "Why did I not just take a step or two to the side during the five hours and over thirty episodes he kept charging that Kamehameha?" "Bah I cannot die as long as my ego is full! Are these really the ratings on my latest game? H0moerotic? Childish? A sociopath? Oh man..." Moral: Your red thumbs cannot hurt me! Im the moralmanBitch! HOAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q why did the kids make fun of timmy A because he was an android with al chunk of metal added accidentally where a real boys crotch would be. Bwilkster

thumb_up thumb_down -17

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Robert Muldoon: "Clever girl..." Velociraptor: "I appreciate your compliment, but I will still eat your face."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

a man walks into a bar and was arrested because it wasn't a bar it was a bank and he shot and killed 4 people during the armed robbery

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I drive in driveways. I recite in recitals. I play in plays. I park on parkways. My greenhouse is green. And my boxing ring is round. Why does everyone think I'm weird??

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the black person say to the other black person? Im really white, I just want to fell what its like to be black.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why are anti-jokes so funny? they aren't. they're stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What does a homeless man get for Christmas? A gun to kill himself with

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why was the Asian teacher fired from her job? A: Because she always showed to school too late and to make matters worse the school had recently found out that she was a raging alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Is everything funnier when u have a vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats 1+1? window!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops