Why couldn't the Nativity have taken place in France? The winters are not warm enough to sleep in an animal cave without getting hypothermia, and there was no census taking place at the time.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

Why was the orphan's christmas sad? He got a violent chest infection and died.

Why did the man trip over the kitten? He was blind.

So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

how do u make a baby cry? you shouldnt. Stop thinking of ways to make a kid cry... asshole.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

What do a banana and helicopter have in common? Neither is a police officer

What's the difference between a bench and a mexican? A bench is an inatimate object that people sit on and a mexican is a person of mexican descent

What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

What stops a train? A missile

Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because Jimmy is a brick wall.

How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

What did Sally get for Christmas? Who's Sally?

An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

Q why did the girl scream A she got hit with an axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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