What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

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Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

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what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

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Three blind men walk into a bar, and, no... wait, sorry just one; so one blind man walked into a bar, and... uh, okay, so it was actually more of a small post. This is pretty much just a plausible, yet unfortunate event. My bad.

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why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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Christopher Reeves walks into a bar.

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What's worse than breastfeeding a wolverine? Force-breastfeeding a wolverine.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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A:Who am i "RRRRRR' B:A pirate A:No im fetty wap

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How did the girl cross the road? --she didn't, she died trying because she was blind and didn't see the sign that said "Don't Walk"

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What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

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Chuck Norris was the leading role in the television show Walker, Texas Ranger.

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How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

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Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

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A man was walking down the sidewalk. Then he turned into a drugstore.

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Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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Old, Asian, Woman who drive

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How can you tell if someone is a virgin? Everyone is a virgin in something. For example, if you never had sex with a dinosaur, then you are a virgin at dinosaur sex.

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what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

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How do you mess with Hellen Keller? Re-arrange her furniture.

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what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops