Whats slower than molasses? A dead baby.

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Why did the weiner dog that punctured Doris' bladder get carried away during an oral sex session? Because the dog had a terribly troubled childhood which led to a faliure to adequately function in adulthood

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? Porn

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Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

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What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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Roses are red, Here's something new. Violets are violet, Not f***ing blue.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: A bleeding penguin.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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What do you call a man with leaves on his head? Steve, he's on camouflage training in the Army.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Ask me if I'mm a candy cane. Shutup, there are a lot of these types of jokes. Create your own you poophead.

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What's worse than failing a test Drowning

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Penis

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How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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What's worse than beating a dead horse? Nothing. Beating a horse is just too much fun

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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