What's black and can't swim? A black shirt.

Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

How are you doing today? I'm fine...Except for the rape.

Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

why couldnt hellen keller drive a car? because she was a woman

what do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? a surgeon.

What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

Q: Whats green and has wheels? A: Any form of motorized vehicle that is made for transportation and has a green paint scheme.

You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

What black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

Why are anti jokes so repetitive? Because you're reading too many, get off your computer.

How do you make a plumber cry? I'm sorry but our princess is in another castle.

Yo momma stank so bad, she might have a serious vaginal infection. You should take her to the hospital.

Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

If your reading this you will realize that this sentence means nothing and I have just taken 5 seconds of your life that you'll never get back.

You're a fat chubby McChubchub fatty fatchub because your fat chubby McChubchubfattychub poop is on your fatty fat Mcphat face of fatchubness because you are the fatty lord of McChubby fat kings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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