when tempuratures get to high the elderly will start to DIE :( ;O

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One

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Yo mama is so fat she needs to wear extra large.

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there square amphibious wood gum flag homos CC

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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How do you make a blonde woman act in a porno? You get her consent and pay her money.

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you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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25.

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why the chicken cross the road? because he just committed 3rd degree murder and was try'in to commit suicide

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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What do you get when you cross a black man and a Mexican man? I don't know.

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Why are you so gay? Because I am a homosexual.

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Jokes=Funny Anti=Opposite Anti+Joke=Anti Joke Anti Joke= Anti Humour Anti Humour + People= Offensive Jokes Offensive Jokes= Often jokes about women Offensive Jokes=Problems Women=Problems

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If John had 4 apples and gave 2 to Mary, what is the circumference of the sun?

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your stupid.

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wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

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Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

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Roses are red, VIolets are blue, Tulips are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

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What do you call someone that has befriended a fisherman? Fishermans friend Moral: Strongest there is.

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What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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