Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Therefore, I am a potato.

A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

anti jokes are really funny

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

Smoke Day, Every Weed.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Starving.

people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

What do porn stars do after they retire? No clue but some idiot made a movie about it.

How many People does it take to change a lightbulb? One

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Why did Jimmy pass out Cause he drank a full tallboy

What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

Q:Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? A:Because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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