A man crossed the road. A chicken stood in a doorway smoking a cigarette wondering why whenever he crosses the street his motives are always questioned yet men and other animals are allowed to go about their day normally. END CHICKEN DISCRIMINATION NOW!

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Exactly what he had asked for because UNICEF do a wonderful job.

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Yes or No? You're wrong because it was both.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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i have a pet duck, when i take it a bath i use cold water, if i use hot water it and i drop a carrot in the tub it will think im cooking it.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

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Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

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What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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A Korean, a Japanese, a Muslim, a Christian, a Jew, a Chinese and a member of Isis are enjoying a friendly game of poker. The Korean man kills everyone because he has a life threatening illness that prevents him from using his brain. The worst news though was that the he lost the game of poker.

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How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

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What's red and a cow? Red cow

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

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Q:what happen to amy's baby A:it was eaten by a dingo.

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What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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