What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the baby duck cry? Because his family just got ran over by a truck

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How many eskimos does it take to build an igloo? It depends... probably about six or seven.

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what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

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A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

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Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

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PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

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What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

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How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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