What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Covert trance, black Ops, and something I kinda made up myself. The first two are basically using suggestions without the victim being aware of it, that is how that famous bank robber that just asks nicely for all the cash and gets it succeeds. The other is tricking the "allmighty" subconcious and again, my own invention people claim its called "this and that", I know, because I coined most of the terms. Anyway, you put people into a deep state of trance, you tell them to take a step forward into the sea, and well, you actually led them down the top of a skyscraper or something fun... "Now... Suck on the lollipop I have between my, okay ill stop"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what do a carrot and an elephant have in common? theyre both orange except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

You were born.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Alister Darling plucks his eyebrows.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

thumb_up thumb_down -15

yo momma's so dumb she attended a dyslexic test and was proven mildly autistic.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's green and fuzy and could kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why did the kid with no legs get eaten by wolves? he couldn't get away

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock Who's there? Your best friend, and I'll always be there for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What Did Charles Manson Do For a Klondike Bar? He Bought One

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops