Roses are white, Violets are white, holy shit i can see the light.

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it was all Tagart

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Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

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So I was making this glass of milk right? So I get the milk out. And I get the soup out.. then I go...wait a minute...where'd the glass of soup come into this glass of situations? *smile+awkard pause because nobody will laugh at this=Success of this anti joke...try it*

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

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Why did the police officer decide to eat a donut? Because he was slightly hungry, but a meal seemed too much for him.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

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Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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Face down, ass up. Thats the way I like to sleep

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Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

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Senior Sergeant Thomas the officer investigating your current rape and insect charges. Please open the door now.

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What's worst than your favorite football team losing the football? Giving birth to a stillborn child.

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gingers

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So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

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A black man walks into a bar, and when he left he paid his tab and couldn't have been more courteous.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Bob

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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