What is black and white and red all over? A road killed zebra.

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What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Its behind you like if you looked behind

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What's green and smells like a dirty whore? A dirty whore

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Q: Why do circles make such good friends? A: They don't. They're shapes and there cannot have friends

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

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What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

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What do you get when you put two landsharks together? Three landsharks.

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Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is an object and the black man is a human being.

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Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Love Chocolate, More Than I Love You

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

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Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

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MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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