Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Sidney was a man, but not just any man... He was a fishmonger.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what do you call two mexicans playing basketball? juan on juan

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how many people were on the bus........ 0 cause the bus was parked for 45 years

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What was Tiger (from Whinnie the Pooh) looking for in the toilet? Pooh

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There once was a man from Nantucket, he was a very nice person and had many friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man had two horses. One was black and one was white. He cut the tail of one of them to tell them apart.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats funnier than anti jokes nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Thankgiving Jimmy: I'm thankful for my family Thomas: I'm thankful for shelter Jake: I'm thankful for running over babies

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Johnny Manziel is the best quarter ever (this isn't a joke just a true statement)

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A black man has just died on your porch. What do you do? Immediately call for medical assistance and perform CPR.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

you know why people who read anti-jokes are stupid? i just had the greatest sex ever!!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Clouds are white.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the man do when it was raining pineapples? He got a chainsaw and went on a killing spree against his neighbors family.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops