A: Knock Knock B: The door is open please come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

knock knock whos there open open who the door

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red Violets are fine I'll be the 6 You be the 9

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red. I f***** a dude. you're a failed abortion. I never loved you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the little boy cry? Because he was badly burnt in a house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -4

lol

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worse than being caught in a downpour? Having your kneecaps ripped out of their sockets.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the African american pulled over in New Jersey? He was 17 and didn't have his red stickers.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your mom is so old, I am surprised she can still own a house and function on her own.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A Man, a chicken and a horse walk in to a bar and sit down at the stools near the jukebox. The jukebox is playing Love Me Tender. The Bartender notices the man pull something from his pocket and hand it to the chicken who takes it in her beak and then turns to the horse and passes it to him. "What'll it be?" says the Bartender. "methamphetamines", says the horse ironically.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Me and the wife spent her Birthday in bed, if you know what I mean. We're both severely disabled.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Pete and Repeat were sitting in a boat. Pete fell off. I hope he was wearing a personal flotation device.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did jimmy cross the road? Because that was the direction the cannon was pointing.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do u say to someone u don't like? I thought I'd let u no tht I don't like u...

thumb_up thumb_down -4

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe, When he woke up one night he discovered with fright, That the friendly old neighbor from next door had broken into his house with a chain saw in an alcohol-induced murder attempt.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

FUCK YOU SAY FUCK YOU SAY SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH THATS WHAT I FUCKING SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

God and Allah are having a metaphysical picnic, God says to his fellow deity: "Why do you think so many humans have been killed in our names?" Allah muses upon this for a moment and replies: "Because they think we exist."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A black guy and a mexican guy are falling from a building. Which one hits the ground first? Who cares

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's better than a gold brick? 2 gold bricks.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Getting your balls chopped off by a maniac on LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops