A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse stares eats an apple and trots out... Horses can't speak therefore do not understand the question and cannot reply

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -Fish

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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Where do dinosaurs go on vacation? Dinosaurs are mainly extinct except for a select few such as crocodiles, which are arguably ancestors of dinosaurs. With this in mind, dinosaurs do not go on vacation because they are dead.

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What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

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Q: How many black guys does it take to black top a driveway? A: I can't give you a definitive answer unless I know the area to be covered, the thickness of material to be applied, and the capabilities of each individual working that particular day.

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You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

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From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

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It got hit by a rocket.

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

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Holy shit Lawman! Next thing we know Nero comes back from the death! Seriously get over here stat and get "my men" under control here! So that last damn Moral was for you! I never understood why he picked me, so he never picked me at all... Man am I relieved! Do you ever fucking get tired of playing the hero? I basically ended up declaring war on Nero`s on people here, what should I do?

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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what do u call a black persons face? a black persons face...

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What was Joe's old name? Joe, I lied about the old part.

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what did the astronaut say to the rocket scientist? hi

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If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

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Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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i like my coffee like i like my women... Without a penis

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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When is the only time you see a Mexican and Black person driving together ? When they feel like it .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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