They say time heals all wounds, yet my leg still had to be amputated.

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What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

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What do you get when you put your dick in a potato? A guy who is into creepy sex

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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What's the difference between a black guy and an asian. They come from different race groups.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

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What's worse than having a spiked club shoved up your butthole? Not much.

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Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

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A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

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Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

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Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

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An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

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What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

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why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

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How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops